At time's I think I am most comfortable in a inadequate and mundane shield of denial... I am aware of it's neverchanging cycle and yet as human nature is so fond of provin... I am warm and fuzzy and content with it's familiarity. Duh. I never will understand the reason's for our seemingly spontaneous blindness to the obstacle's we find as we travel pathway's in our live's...just sitting there, enormous and steadfast and totally in our way. And the justification for alm,ost welcoming the larger than imaginable anchor that we almost suddenly one day while minding our own business, find clamped around our ankle's or varying other limbs somehow left vulnerable for it's stronghold...is increduously a reoccurance that puzzles me and confuses me straight into dizziness. I amd in the throes of these big bad boogie monster's and have until now made okay thier familiar ugly faces... reciting the stranger than fiction notion's they talk to me about over and over and out of habit, almost believing they are real...

Into what sort of tomorrow would that lead...? Well if anything and after it all is said and done, I have to remember that I don't believe in monster's or the boogeyman as creatuire's or seperate living thing's than I am.. We are the same...and it is ridiculous trying to scare myself and using fear tactics to exhibit self contol. I guess I mean that I am not afraid...or controlled by the scary unknown of it all... I will not be dragged down and nothing will stand in my way. I am not listening to the lie's for one second longer and have no more time to sit through this same old overtold, played out, uncomfortable uneventful going nowhere fast fable. It's my time for now and into tomorrow... I am the possibility of my creation infinite unbridled desire and the one step I now get to take onto a path of anywhere and anything could happen.

Blessed by the coming of every tomorrow...

~M~